Most of us have not been lucky to have had good mirroring when we were growing up. We were constantly admonished, reprimanded, undermined, and forced to submit to the dictates of the adults in our lives. The fear of God and fear of the boogeyman was drummed into us.
Our greatest fear is ‘what will others think.’
Being Fearful Blocks Higher Thinking
Fear drives the lives of a vast number of the human race. Moreso, if you grew up in a violent, abusive, rejecting environment. When threatened, your amygdala, the emotional part of the brain, which regulates the fight or flight
response., responds irrationally.
We are caught in an “amygdala hijack” or emotional hijack’. Further, during an amygdala hijack the higher cortex of the brain go offline and we become reactive and irrational.
Our earlier programming comes into play. And fear fogs up our perception preventing us from seeing things clearly. Negativity, doubt, fear, and anger become our way of relating to the world. And that only creates further problems and alienation from the world.
Your view of the world and subsequent relating with it is f**ked up by your past fearful negative reality. Changing this mindset requires a mind shift.
Stay Away From Toxic Negative People
Emotions are contagious, stay away from people who are toxic and negative. The mirror neurons in our brain cause us to mimic the facial expressions of others due to emotional contagion. Research has shown how easy it is to “catch” others’ emotions, both positive and negative.
Upbeat emotions such as enthusiasm and joy, as well as negative ones, including sadness, fear, and anger, are easily passed from person to person, often without either party realizing
Emotional contagion occurs unconsciously in a matter of milliseconds. It”s a primitive instinct over which we have little control.
Stop Giving A F**k
There is no right and wrong way. Sometimes things work out and other times they pan out. Learn the lesson and move on. Stop feeling unnecessary guilt or shame and getting stuck in the fear loop of “what will other people think.’
Nobody really gives a damn, they are busy thinking about themselves. You are good enough, don’t fear not fitting in. Everyone is on their own unique life path.
Do Different Things & Things Differently
Novelty is the cornerstone of brain change. When we do things like learning a new skill our mind is forced to focus on the present moment.
Mastery over a skill like carpentry or even something mundane like cooking helps us overcome our fear mindset that I am not capable. Small victories lead to major successes.
Belief In Yourself & Higher Purpose
Why we are here, is a question we all grapple with. Trusting that our lives have a purpose and doing our best with whatever cards we are handed.
Jesus said, ‘having the faith of mustard seed’ can make miracles happen.
Moreover, science has proved the healing power of belief. Faith, hope, and belief allow us to leapfrog over our paralyzing fear mindset.
Bring In A Mindshift
As we move into the New Year we must be proactive towards moving out of our fear-based negative reality.
Our past need not define us. Our biology need not become our destiny. Enough studies have shown that our brain is plastic and epigenetic changes are possible at any age. All you need to do is have a mind shift.
Image Source: Pixabay
Further Reading:
Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman
Rewire Your Brain: Think Your Way to a Better Life – John B. Arden
Gifts From A Challenging Childhood: Creating A Practice for Becoming Your Healthiest Self –
The Biology of Belief: Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter, and Miracles– Bruce Lipton
Trauma and Memory: Brain and Body in a Search for the Living Past: A Practical Guide for Understanding and Working with Traumatic Memory – Peter A. Levine
