Today, everybody seems to be into mindfulness. In my search for that magic pill to heal my emotional pain, I have tried to put my mind to it but my mind just does not seem comfortable with it.
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Abuse & Meditative Practises
Those of us who have been abused are at times in such horrible emotional pain from the thoughts and memories that sitting alone and watching our thoughts is very traumatic. The whole idea is to forget about our pain. That is why there are so many addicts around, all trying to numb their pain.
After a few attempts, I gave up because it only made me feel worse. So I began researching about the topic and here what Josh Korda a popular meditation teacher says about the limitation of meditation ‘Meditative practices performed in isolation can help us recognize and process our emotional states, but true healing lies in those most vulnerable moments, when someone looks us in the eye, sees our pain and provides us with the mirror we so deeply seek.’
I have done a comparative study on Mindfulness and Mind Kindness. And guess which is better?
Mindfulness | Mind Kindness |
---|---|
You need to make time in your busy schedule. | Can be done anytime and anywhere. |
Time duration to complete is longer. | Can be done in a second. Try giving your seat to someone when travelling. |
The effect lasts for a short while and needs to be repeated daily. | The effect lasts for a lifetime and even a small act of kindness has reverberating effects. |
Watching someone practicing mindfulness does nothing to anyone else but the practitioner. | Watching acts of kindness produces oxytoxin and improves our mood. |
Takes effort to let go of the left brain to engage the right brain for synchronization of the hemispheres to happen. | When practicing kindness we enter into a flow state, where both brain hemispheres are synchronized which is the optimum state of happiness. |
Mindfulness is a singular activity and requires one to take time out from family and friends which may not be taken well by those with whom we are in a relationship with. | Mind kindness improves relationships and reduces loneliness. |
You have to make an effort to focus, basically follow a technique, takes time to learn. | Comes naturally, if one has experienced it as a child. It is contagious. |
A few links on the pitfalls of mindfulness.
- Is Mindfulness Making Us Ill
- Mindfulness backlash: Could meditation be bad for your health?
- Mindfulness isn’t going to cure our mental health crisis, and we need to stop pretending like it could
- When Meditation Worsens Depression or Anxiety
- New Data on the Adverse Effects of Meditation and Mindfulness
Simple Acts of Kindness – Give it a try
Practicing kindness is easy and it helps ease our pain of loneliness. We cannot be kind in a vacuum. You require people. Being in a loving relationship is what really heals childhood trauma.
My only advice is don’t forget to be kind to yourself, nurture yourself and know how to stand up for yourself. Healing happens when we let go, not by focussing on something inward. We outgrow our past when we look outward with hope, kindness, and love for ourselves and others.